One of my best friends always reminds me that I’m going to Hell. I mean....she means in it in a loving way. She is a firm believer in Heaven and Hell. I’m still working that one out (blog on that one day)
“You have to forgive the people who hurt you.” Mmmmmmmm do I though?
Okay, look, I’m all about forgiving people who are remorseful. When someone is truly sorry for what they did, then sure. That is different though. I think we have all been hurt by someone who hasn’t apologized and mostly likely never will. Now, that.....that is hard to forgive.
In certain situations, you have to move on without any sort of remorse or understanding from that person and trusts me, that can take years. For a long time, you wonder if they even care. It makes you SO angry for a long time. How can you forgive someone who isn’t sorry?
Here, I tell you how. I hate that phrase “you have to forgive them for yourself” okay well first of all I really don’t have to do SHIT. I never thought I could let go of my anger. I thought for the rest of my life I’ll always be mad at the people who hurt me. I’ve come to realize though that....that’s not true.
Somewhere down the road, I stopped caring. I stopped caring about if they cared or if they were sorry. In reality, I don’t need them too. I moved on by myself. I didn’t need to “forgive”, I just don’t care anymore. And I decided that, no one else. I also don’t use the word forgive, because even though I’ve moved on, I still never want that person to feel like what they did was okay. Still, I’m glad that whatever happened, happened. For every person I lose, I gain a better one. And they lost me. Oooooooo bummer.
Now this applies to ALL types of relationships, because we have all lost toxic people in our lives. Whether they were a lover, parent, sister, aunt or uncle, mentor, cousin, or best friend. They hurt you to the point where they are now strangers to you. And yet, your life is better. It’s okay to still grieve that betrayal. I know I do.
Hey, if you really can forgive, then that is awesome. You do whatever you need to do to heal yourself. Whatever gets you to that place where you are FINALLY okay.